Being promoted to manager is a great step in your career. It is recognition of a solid track record, expertise or strong commitment. But this role cannot be improvised. And if there is one thing to deconstruct when taking on this new position, it is perfectionism.

Contrary to popular belief, perfectionism is not simply a desire to do a good job. It stems from a fear: the fear of doing something wrong, of being judged, criticised, or not being up to the task. To protect oneself from this, the reflex is to want to control everything, master everything, anticipate everything. This is a costly strategy, which may still work as an individual contributor, but quickly becomes untenable – even dangerous – once one takes on a managerial role.

Why? Because a manager cannot do everything. It is no longer a question of executing tasks or being an expert in one’s field, but of coordinating, uniting and guiding a team towards collective goals. And to do that, you need to know how to prioritise, delegate, say no, manage uncertainty… All skills that perfectionists often struggle to mobilise.

Recognising perfectionism

A perfectionist manager tends to want to keep control of everything. They think: ‘It will be quicker if I do it myself’, ‘I can’t delegate, it takes too long and it won’t be done the way I want it’, ‘Asking for help means admitting that I’m not up to the job…’

The result: excessive workload, chronic fatigue, stress, isolation… and sometimes burnout.

But perfectionism doesn’t just hurt the manager: it also holds back the team. A manager who doesn’t trust others, who controls everything, who leaves no room for initiative, prevents their employees from growing. The atmosphere becomes tense, autonomy is stifled, creativity is curbed. This generates frustration, loss of autonomy and a decline in energy within the team. Some managers become rigid and authoritarian without even realising it, convinced that it is ‘for the good of the project’.

Added to this is another pitfall: the fear of not being liked. Because some perfectionists also seek to please. In addition to ‘doing everything perfectly’, they also want to ‘be perfect’ in order to be appreciated by everyone. Saying no then becomes difficult. Setting boundaries is seen as a risk. However, a manager is not there to please, but to help people grow. They are not there to shine, but to help others shine.

Successful delegation and trust

A good manager knows how to draw on the talents of their team. They step out of their role as an expert to become a mentor, facilitator and leader. They create a climate of trust, motivate others around a shared vision and enable everyone to give their best. To do this, they must learn to let go of control, trust, listen and guide without micromanaging. They must accept that they cannot control everything in order to create a high-performing team.

In my coaching sessions, I often meet managers who are trapped by their perfectionism: tired, overwhelmed and frustrated at not being able to ‘do everything right’. And I meet demotivated employees, lacking in energy, held back by a manager who doesn’t give them any leeway.

Dear managers, here’s some advice to help you avoid getting lost in this demanding role: let go of your perfectionism. For your own sake, for your managerial performance, for your mental health and your work-life balance. You will feel lighter and more aligned, and your team will reap the full benefits.

Need help letting go of your perfectionism? Book your discovery session, I’d be happy to help you.